I don't mean like the story you read in a book. I'm talking about the one planned by the "Big Man"...the Father. You know...GOD.
I've been trying to figure out what I want for my future. College? Trade school? A writing career? An art or photography degree? All of these things I would enjoy, but then I got to thinking into a much more "higher" level.
I already have a life planned for me. God planned my future from the moment He thought me up...should I really be worrying about if I'll make a mistake or bad decision regarding my personal talents or possible careers? I know I need to reflect and carefully choose my ways...but if I do both of these things, what's there to stress out about?
I love to write. LOVE it. Probably even more than I do photography and it's definitely right up there (if not ahead of) drawing. I guess you could say that writing is my way of putting all of my emotions, personal thoughts and trials of life into a story-formed version of a diary. A diary that I would like to share with the world. Will I have books published? Is that my future? ...Should I even be wondering?
I understand I need to discern and pray about how my life will turn out once I'm done with high-school. But I keep having to snap myself out of it whenever I'm worrying and let myself know that everything will work out.
............I have time. I'm only 15 going on 16.
I feel like life is pushing me along...trying to make me hurry and "choose" a little too quickly.
I need to slow down. I need to stop rushing myself and realize that I'm in the prime of my life...the rosebud. I haven't quite bloomed yet...but with sunshine (prayer) and rain (discernment), I know my petals with show. And I hope they'll be red and sweet-smelling, and not brown or crumpled like they could be.
"What's inside?"
??????
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Hm, interesting post. I have about the opposite problem. People are always telling me, "You have time to discern and think about it!" but, what if I don't? St. Therese entered the convent at, I believe 15 because that was God's plan for her. I'm not saying that everyone knows where they're going at 15 or even 20, but I think that we always assume we have so much time. Life is short, eternity is long. I am glad you are open to discerning vocation, lots and lots of prayer and complete openness. Don't think I'm rushing you or anything like that, I agree to an extent. Maybe it's just because I'm having to many people say that I have time, and not enough to say I don't. You shouldn't freak out about it, though. But, remember when you find your vocation, follow it.
ReplyDeleteIn Christ,
Claire
That's a good point.
ReplyDeleteI'm not saying people SHOULDN'T figure out what their "plan" is right away...some do (like you said about St. Therese :)
But as for ME...I think God wants me to "think" a little bit longer before I decide :)
Maybe it's different for you...but like you said...We shouldn't stress out about it ~ xo
Thanks for your comment!
Laura
Not to rush things here, but maybe you should be a journalist??...
ReplyDeleteHmmmm......an interesting idea, BFF :)
ReplyDeleteLaura
I love this post for so many reasons.
ReplyDelete1) I am soooooooo thankful that God allowed me the privilege of being your mother.
2) I am so glad to see that you recognize your own gifts and talents; ones that we, who love you could see from the time you were but knee-high to a rosebud...ha ha...good one, eh?
3) I LOVE that you are gaining an understanding of the relationship between prayer, discernment, and SURRENDER to God's will...you are RIGHT ON here Laura...for Jesus said in Scripture that we are NOT to worry about tomorrow, for it will take care of itself...if you continue to pray, discern, discuss with trusted loved ones and leaders in your life, and DREAM...then you are right...God WILL lead you and you WILL be able to be comfortable and confident in the choices you make. It's not as though there is one RIGHT answer and God is waiting to see if you get it right or wrong...If you choose out of love of God and a desire to serve Him...then whatever you choose will be "right".
4) I completely agree that you do not have to RUSH and can take time to enjoy the "NOW" season of your life...just "BE" and enjoy where God has you "NOW". This is a lesson for we moms to learn as well...for we too, fall into "worry" about where this child or that child will end up when they are grown...you are reminding me that I too, can enjoy the "NOW" of my children and trust that they will know their calling when the time comes!!!!!
5) As to Claire's beautiful insights...yes...it is always good to be thinking and praying and OPEN to the possibility of what God might ask of you...but He is already asking things of you NOW...and I think He wants young people to enjoy their youth...not in a frivolous manner...but in the deep joy and blessing of it...which includes thinking of the future...but also...embracing the innocence of the present...does that make sense?
I love you girls and I love visiting your blogs where you are expressing these ideas!
Thanks Laura...this was a great post!
xo
Mom
Thanks mom!
ReplyDeleteThose are amazing points :)
xoxoxoxoxoxoxox Love you ~
Pudding